Cleaning

I had trouble falling asleep last night. I stayed up way later than usual. Was anything new bothering me? am I still that upset that I can't get my beauty rest?

Or can it be more simple - I am not a messy person, I like things neat, orderly, and in their place. Yet if you have seen the room I have been living in since the break up - it is a disaster. Piles of this and that, papers and clothes mostly, but a mess just the same.

I've always slept better when I knew my bedroom was clean. When with my eyes closed I knew everything was put away in its spot. Right now I am not sure where anything is...

Perhaps a sign of progress that my messy room is now my focus and not dwelling in self pity. Not that I truly did dwell...but I did feel bad for myself. Now I feel more guilty that I have made my room the mess that it is and I have only myself to clean it up.

This week shall then be focused on cleaning. Putting things back in their place. I will be visiting a good friend this weekend. Its good to have goals- no I will not stay up all night tonight trying to clean this mess - but I will plan on having everything cleaned by the weekend. That way I can go away, relax, have fun, and come home to a nice clean room and back to sleeping soundly. Ahhh.